Dear William, Daniel, Catherine, (and Michael & Baby Girl Y) (and your parents), (and any future descendants and their parents),

Today is Mother’s Day — Be sure to give YOUR Mom a great big kiss and hug; give her a Mother’s Day card; giver her a flower (or a bunch of flowers); maker her breakfast; and be nice to her ALL day.

Also, remember all the other mothers you know, your Grandmothers, your Great-Grandmothers; and for William and Daniel, should you have a wife some day in the future, and if you have children, do NOT forget THEIR Mother!

Love,

Dziadziuś Paweł.

Dear William, Daniel, Catherine, (and Michael & Baby Girl Y) (and your parents), (and any future descendants and their parents),

Today is May 7 — that date reminds me of the title to the movie “Seven Days of May” — a movie about making peace, not war:

Now, I would like to take this opportunity to discuss a serious topic with you — conflict, negotiation, and peace.

May 2, 2010, at 11 am: Dziadziuś Paweł & Babcia Krysia — a Moment in Time, for the New York Times

The picture above was taken on May 2, 2010, at 11 am, at the request of the New York Times — we were to take a photograph on May 2, 2010, at 11 am, of something meaningful to us at that time, and submit it to the New York Times to be shared with everyone else. When we saw the request announcement in the New York Times several days before May 2, Babcia Krysia and I decided to participate.

On May 2, 2010, Babcia Krysia and I were on one of our road-trips, I think on our way to Philadelphia. As 11 am approached, we were on Route 1, traveling South, near Princeton, New Jersey. We looked around, and we saw the road sign that was PERFECT for US. We set up the camera on a tripod, and then, ten seconds before 11 am, we set the camera on a 10 second delay, as we ran to the sign and had our picture taken. (We did submit out picture, but there was a glitch in the transmission, so it never made it into the pool of photos; nevertheless, we did participate.)

So, why this sign?!

Because … no matter what, ALWAYS, when one of us chooses right, the other chooses left; when one of us chooses black, the other chooses white; when one of us chooses yes, the other chooses no — and then, an extensive negotiation starts. That negotiation might take a second or two, or a day or two, or a week or two, or a month or two, or a year or two, or a lifetime or two.

The resolution of that negotiation may make us both happy; or it may make us both unhappy; or it make take us to an unexpected result.

Yesterday I told you that “Babcia Krysia is just a ‘wet mop’” about celebrating certain holidays (e.g., Cinco De Mayo and St. Patrick’s Day — I will discuss Halloween and Easter photos some other day). The original version of that Post had a different photo where Babcia Krysia’s photo is now. I did not seek prior editorial approval before I posted the Post; and, as soon as I posted it, I received a warning from a very dear family member, who told me that I may be in DEEEEEEP trouble. Oh; Oh!

But nothing happened. I came home in the evening — and still nothing. So I ask: Did you see my post to the kids earlier today?  Reply: You have a very good Daughter-In-Law — she gave you good advice.

I ask: What do you mean? Reply: I do not like that picture of me. … I ask: Why not?  … What if something happens to me — I do not want the kids to associate that image with me.

I feel SO bad!

I felt so BAD! I went upstairs; I changed the picture; and I sent myself to the Dog House.

And so, here we are — now you know about the movie “Seven Days In May” and about A Moment In Time published in The New York Times (WITHOUT our picture, even though we took one); and the back story of yesterday’s Post.

Love,

Dziadziuś Paweł.

Dear William, Daniel, Catherine, (and Michael & Baby Girl Y) (and your parents), (and any future descendants and their parents),

Dziadziuś Paweł

The Post that I wrote to you earlier today got a cool reception. Fortunately, Catherine’s Mom warned me about it; so it was not a total shock to me when I came home; but, I did have to make an alteration to the Post by replacing the “offending” picture. Oh well. I did not think it was so bad — but Stephanie, and Babcia Krysia thought otherwise.

Fortunately it is not raining today. And, the temperature is warm. This will be an adventure — just like camping!

Talk to you soon.

Love,

Dziadziuś Paweł.

Dear William, Daniel, Catherine, (and Michael & Baby Girl Y) (and your parents), (and any future descendants and their parents),

Circa 1961, “West Side Story” fascinated me, and my friends. I think that I saw that movie, in the movie theater, approximately 25 times. My friends and I knew the all the songs from the movie; we would re-enact all the scenes; and, in turn, we would play the various characters in the movie. Most often, I would identify with Tony, and sometimes with Bernardo.

This movie is a modern version of William Shakespeare‘s “Romeo and Juliet” — it is a tragedy. A tragedy is a drama that involves human suffering, it is usually very sad, and it ends very badly, usually with someone’s death.

A few days ago I was writing to you about modern class struggles in Baltimore — well, in 1961, in New York City, one of the main class struggles was between established “Americans,” depicted in this movie by the gang called the “Jets,” and the new immigrants from Puerto Rico, depicted in this movie by the gang called the “Sharks.”

Notice how Bernardo and many of the other young men wore leather wrist bands — for over a year, I never left home without mine.

Here is the opening scene from the movie:

The social struggles between the members of the Sharks and the Jets become complicated when Tony, a former leader of the Jets, meets Maria, Bernardo’s sister (Bernardo is the leader of the Sharks); and they fall in love.

Another struggle in the movie is between the experience of the Puerto Rican man and the Puerto Rican women — between the disappointments of reality and the hopes that America offers. That conflict is explored in this dance number:

Ultimately, the conflicts between the Sharks and the Jest explode into a rumble — a violent fight — which ends with an unexpected death, just like in the play Romeo and Juliet.

I am sure you will study this play Romeo and Juliet in school — pay attention to it. Learn from it; incorporate its lessons into your own lives; and try to avoid those heartaches in your lives as much as possible.

Love,

Dziadziuś Paweł.

Dear William, Daniel, Catherine, (and Michael & Baby Girl Y) (and your parents), (and any future descendants and their parents),

This morning I told you about how Babcia Krysia, in my mind, became a contender to be my wife. Now let me tell you the story of the “blue eye-shadowed blond bombshell” that Bacia Kyrsia still talks about to this day!

Unknown male, Olenka, Tom, Lydia Fetera, John Galiano, Krysia, Irka ?, Pawel

As we often did, whenever there was a Ball, all of us would attend. This particular Ball, which has totally faded in memory as to time and place, was attended by many of us, family and friends, including Olenka and some guy; Tom and his then girlfriend, Lydia Fetera — she was from New Britain, Connecticut; a very nice girl; I had dated her for a while, but the relationship exhausted itself due to geographic undesirability; Babcia Krysia and her boyfriend, John Gagliano; and, I showed up with a BEAUTIFUL blond, in a sparkling gold dress, wearing blue eye-shadow. Well! Everyone’s jaw dropped. Her name was Irka (Irene). I do not remember her last name; and I do not remember where she lived; or how I met her; BUT, she was BEAUTIFUL, (and also very nice).

Babcia Krysia had a steady boyfriend (John), but, secretly, all her Polish Girl Scout friends “knew” that she and I were destined for each other. So, when I showed up with this BEAUTIFUL blond, in a sparkling gold dress, wearing blue eye-shadow, the Ball-room was abuzz. There were several conferences in the ladies-room, and Babcia Krysia received many words of wisdom from the many “older” [16 & 17 year old] women in the room.

As things turned out, I do not believe that I ever saw Iraka again. And most importantly, I have enjoyed a life of happiness being married to Babcia Krysia. (But, if you want to raise Babcia Krysia’s blood pressure, ask her what does she think of blonds wearing blue eye-shadow.)

Love,

Dziadziuś Paweł.

Dear William, Daniel, Catherine, (and Michael & Baby Girl Y) (and your parents), (and any future descendants and their parents),

Yesterday I told you that things got a bit better in Baltimore; but, yesterday, throughout the day, demonstrations spread to other major cities — Boston, Chicago, Denver, Houston, Minneapolis, New York, and Washington. Many people were arrested for disorderly conduct.

[Babcia Krysia wants you to know that there is more interesting stuff after this news article.]

Meanwhile, nothing is being done (publicly) to clarify the circumstances that lead to Mr. Gray’s death. Also, there is much debate about the parenting methods of the Mom who pulled her son out of the demonstration (I wrote to you about her yesterday) — some people feel that she should not have hit her child; others feel that she needed to take drastic measures to save her son’s life.

I am so conflicted about all of this — I am definitely against violence and disorderly conduct; but I am also against inappropriate governmental conduct. I wish the three of you were old enough to advise me on these issues — I would very much welcome your wisdom, perspective, experience and advice. But, remember, as you grow up, to gain wisdom, perspective and experience, so that you can give good advice, you need to keep up with the news, on a daily basis. Watch and read different news sources, so you are aware of different points of view. Whatever you see or hear, do so critically — think about it; does it make sense? What would you do under the circumstances? What else could be done? Who else should be consulted? What other option should be explored?

Seeing so much police activity on the television reminded me of my days as a New York City Auxiliary Police Officer.

It was circa [I explained this word to you HERE] 1970 or 1971 when I heard about the New York City Auxiliary Police Officer program. I was intrigued, found out more about it, took the training program, and joined the force. At the time, I lived in Forest Hills, Queens, New York City, with my parents. I was an undergraduate student in college (Baruch College, part of the City University of New York).

112th Precinct – Forest Hills

Forest Hills was serviced by the 112th Precinct; so I joined the 112th Precinct.

As an Auxiliary Police Officer, I would be assigned to a patrol route, usually with another Auxiliary Police Officer, and our job would be to be the eyes and ears of the regular police officers — we were NOT expected to actually engage in any dangerous activities. We did not have guns. We had a uniform, a badge, a radio, a billy-club, and hand-cuffs (I think that the hand-cuffs were to assist a real police officer if the need arose — in my case, it never arose). During our patrol, we would check in periodically by radio (and, if we saw something suspicious); and a patrol-car would check-in with us also during our shift.

94th Precinct – Greenpoint

Once Babcia Krysia and I married in 1972, we moved to Greenpoint, Brooklyn. So, I transferred to the 94th Precinct in Greenpoint. But, I then went to Graduate School in the evenings, and I had a full time job in the daytime, so I did not have the time to continue with the Auxiliary Police Officer program; so, I had to resign. Nevertheless, I enjoyed my participation in the program; and I am very glad that I did it. It gave me the opportunity to see some of the routine of the job of the cops that protect us all.

Love,

Dziadziuś Paweł.

Dear William, Daniel, Catherine, (and Michael & Baby Girl Y) (and your parents), (and any future descendants and their parents),

After yesterday, today is a new day, and things are looking much better. The people of Baltimore took control of the situation, they stood between the trouble-makers and the police to insure that there would be no more violence, they started cleaning up, and the Maryland National Guard was activated to support the police in keeping the peace.

One mother became a national sensation when she spotted her son about to throw a rock at the police, and she ran out into the street and stopped him; all as the press was filming — she just may have saved his life; and she is considered by many to be a real hero.

These troubles in Baltimore are not just about police brutality; they are also about social injustice. They are not just about race discrimination — they are also about social discrimination. Poor people need jobs; poor people need housing; poor people need education; poor people need medical care; poor people need hope; and poor people need the means to stop being poor people.

Whatever you become in life, remember to do your part for the betterment of poor people — be that through your donations, and/or your expenditures, and/or your attitudes. Whatever your do; do something!

Today we also celebrate two birthdays — my nephew’s (Zak Kostro) and my cousin’s (Alicja Stegawska). To see the Family Tree that I prepared for you, so you can see how these two individuals relate to you, you will need to find what is most comfortable for you — for me, I clicked on the Family Tree (below this paragraph), and then, I set my Screen Zoom to 25%, then I clicked on the Family Tree again, and then I could comfortably read the names, and scroll right and left as needed. [Do not forget to readjust your Zoom back to 100% once you are finished looking at this Family Tree; otherwise, everything will look very strange on your computer monitro.] Can you find yourself in this Family Tree?

Looking at this Family Tree, you may wonder how you relate to the people who are on the same horizontal level as the three of you (I mean: Gavin Dzikowski; Garett Dzikowski; Andrew Dzikowski; Kevin Dziowski; Jack Dzikowski; James Dzikowski; Vincent Gatto; Agela Gatto; Lena Tymowska; Maksym Tymowski; Kayah Bittner; Borys Bittner; and Nina Stegawska) — well, they are your Third Cousins.

The three of you (William, Daniel and Catherine) are First Cousins to each other (the reason for that is because you are children of siblings — Mark, Richard and Margaret).

Children of First Cousins are Second Cousins to each other. Children of Second Cousins are Third Cousins to each other.

You probably have many more Third Cousins because this Family Tree is ONLY from the point of view of my Maternal Grandfather (Antoni Dzikowski). Other Family Trees could be created from the points of view of my Paternal Grandfather (Zygmunt Kostro); Babcia Krysia’s Grandparents; William’s Mom’s Grandparents; Daniel’s Dad’s Grandparents; and Catherine’s Mom’s Grandparents.

So, you see, each one of you is part of a very large family!

Love,

Dziadziuś Paweł.